Stop Reacting to Everything
Reaction. Recently I found myself struggling. At work, at home, everywhere. I felt like I was working all day but not accomplishing anything, I was trying to be a good husband and father, but just felt empty like I was going through the motions. This went on for close to 2 weeks, and I was just burnt out. Mentally, physically, the whole 9 yards. I started journaling as an exercise to get in the habit of writing more, and one day I just poured everything I was feeling out on the page. That felt great, but ultimately it provided much more than an emotional release. It provided me with a road map to what I was feeling and how to get past it. I realized that I was reacting to everything. I was waking up reacting to the baby waking me up, so from the very beginning of my day I was reacting to something that I had no real control over. Then from there I was in a rush trying to get my things done, before our older daughter woke up and I had to react to her needs. Then I would go to work and try to figure out what needed to be done for the day. All the while I was reacting to every email, or situation that came up. To every little piece of information that came across my desk. All day long reacting to my environment.
It never occurred to me, because I hadn’t written out what was frustrating me. Once I had it in front of me it was clear why I felt the way I did, and then the solution was easy. I needed to take control of the things that I could, and forget about the things that I couldn’t. Charles Swindoll said “Life is 10% what happens to us, and 90% how we react to it” Inevitably there will be things in our life that we can’t control, that’s fine, and they should be treated accordingly. If I can’t control or change it, then I’m not going to spend my time and energy worrying about it. As for my situation it was an easy fix. I started going to be and getting up earlier. I can control what time I get up, I can’t control what time the baby gets up. So I started getting up 30 minutes before the baby’s wake up time, and I did the things that I needed to do to get ready for the day. If the baby slept in a little then I got more done than I needed to, even better I could get a head start on getting things ready for our daughter. If he woke up a little early then I still had most of what I needed done. Boom I was starting my day with a “win” and felt very productive. Then it was simple to fix what was happening at work, I needed a list. Each night before I go to bed I go to a note on my phone and I make a list of the things that I need to accomplish the next day, and of the things I would like to accomplish. This is something that I used to be very good at, but had somehow gotten out of the habit. I could probably write a whole post about how I prioritize that list, but we will save that for another day.
Those were 2 very small adjustments that were easy to implement, and they made all the difference. My mental health improved, I felt and became more productive, and all of that carried over into my family life. Life stopped happening to me, and started happening for me. Since I went through this and had my little “reaction epiphany” I have talked with a few other people and been able to help them with similar situations. The mentality behind it doesn’t just have to apply to work situations either, it can also be tied to food. Maybe you are really strict on your diet during the week, but then you go out to eat with friends on the weekend and the “wheels fall off”. It doesn’t have to be like that. What if you recognized this was happening and came up with a plan to avoid or minimize this binge. What if you ate a full healthy meal before you went out? Then maybe all you get is a salad and dessert. Instead of eating all the bread on the table, a salad, a full (unhealthy) meal, and dessert. Just like that you still got to have your “cheat meal” but didn’t go completely off the rails. Side note: I do this all the time for budget reasons; eat at home before going out to eat so I don’t spend $200 trying to get full at the restaurant.
There it is, it really can be as simple as identifying what you’re reacting to and coming up with a plan. So what is it that you’re reacting to?
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Week 1 of the Open is down! Here are your top Intramural Scores:
Top Male RX’d Scores: Matt Reilly/Andy Zimmerman/Jack Howard
Top Male Scaled Scores: Lee Geraci/Evan Alexander/Tim Witham
Top Female RX’d Scores: Catherine Sanburn/Leah Cole/Morgan Zimmerman
Top Female Scaled Scores: Emma Schmidt/Allie Reilly/Erica Witham
Fit Aid Fan Moment of the Week: Emma Schmidt doing 20.1 in a boot!!!
